Last night’s Teen Choice Awards could have been called the More Evidence That High School Musical Is Taking Over the Universe Awards. But I guess that would be too long to fit on the trophies. While South of Nowhere lost the Choice Breakout TV show award to Heroes, fellow staging-afterellencom.kinsta.cloud reader favorite Degrassi won the Choice Summer TV award. See the complete list of winners here. In the interest of full disclosure, I’ll admit that I did not watch the show. I’m so far out of the teen demographic that to tune in would have been mildly creepy. However, I have no problem scanning the pictures afterward. Voyeurism, journalism – it’s a thin line. And with that, I give you my completely unprofessional, randomly snarky thoughts on the stars of the Teen Choice Awards.
Hilary Duff and Eve: Is this too much back and front for these ladies to be showing at a show for teenagers, or am I just a being a prude? Ashley Jensen and America Ferrera: These two are causing me to have some decidedly R-rated thoughts during an entirely PG-rated show.
Zac Efron: He’s not a girl, not yet a woman. What? He’s pretty, that’s all. Aimee Teegarden, Avril Lavigne and Monique Coleman: The Goldilocks scale of appropriate levels of red-carpet excitement: too much, too little, just right. Emmy Rossum, Vanessa Anne Hudgens, Megan Fox and Miley Cyrus: And the award for Less Original Than You Thought You Were goes to … Kelly Clarkson and Ryan Seacrest: And the award for Freakiest Red Carpet Couple goes to … Emily Deschanel: Oh, thank God, a grown-up. John Travolta manhandling Nikki Blonsky: Oh, dear God, a creepy grown-up. Jessica Alba and, shudder, Dane Cook: For best viewing results: Raise your right hand, put it over the corresponding side of your computer screen and, ahhh, much better.
