Rebel Wilson took to Instagram to announce her relationship with Ramona Agruma “I thought I was searching for a Disney Prince,” the 42-year-old actress posted. “But maybe what I really needed all this time was a Disney Princess. #LoveIsLove.”
If the picture is anything to go by, Wilson and Agruma are blissfully happy together. But Wilson didn’t come out because she chose to. Wilson came out after the Sydney Morning Herald pressured her to do so. In a since deleted article, Sydney Morning Herald themselves admitted to it:
“As Rebel Wilson knows, we do not live in a perfect world. So, it was [with] an abundance of caution and respect that this media outlet emailed Rebel Wilson’s representatives on Thursday morning, giving her two days to comment on her new relationship with another woman, LA leisure wear designer Ramona Agruma, before publishing a single word.”
In other words, Sydney Morning Herald contacted Rebel Wilson to let her know that – in 48 hours – they would out her, with or without her consent. Rather than granting the publication that threatened to out her an exclusive scoop, Wilson took to Instagram and came out there.
Sydney Morning Herald’s audacity doesn’t stop there. They then had the gall to complain about how Wilson came out, calling it a “big mistake” to ignore their “discreet, genuine queries.”
SMH then went on to frame their outing of Wilson as a pro-gay rights stance. Hypocrisy that is all the more shocking because it happened during Pride Month:
“This is understood to be Wilson’s first same-sex relationship, at age 42 and in an era when same-sex marriage is legal in many parts of the world and – thanks to decades of battling for equality – sexual orientation is no longer something to be hidden, even in Hollywood.
“Up to now, Wilson had identified publicly as a heterosexual woman. It is unlikely she would have experienced the sort of discrimination let alone homophobia – subconscious or overt – that sadly still affects so many gay, lesbian, and non-hetero people.”
First of all, do we even know that she identified as heterosexual, or merely that she was assumed to be heterosexual by the media? Where are the receipts? Maybe she’s kept her private life private.
But Sydney Morning Herald’s behavior – the practice of outing LGB people against their will – is deeply harmful. It has a long, homophobic history. And, in extreme cases, outing has led to men and women taking their own lives.
Coming out of the closet can be freeing. But the sad fact is that, no matter how many strides we have made towards equality in recent years, it’s not safe for everybody to do so. For some people, coming out could damage their family relationships and leave them without any kind of social safety net. For others, coming out could jeopardize their careers and ability to make a livelihood.
In her recent memoir, Lauren Hough wrote with great eloquence about how Air Force colleagues responded to her lesbianism – her car was set on fire, and she received death threats. This is not the distant past. Hough is a mere three years older than Wilson. And actresses absolutely are at risk of backlash for being in relationships with women.
In an industry where a woman’s worth is too often defined by her appeal to men, there are still negative consequences attached to being out as lesbian or bi. An actress runs the risk of being typecast, or being excluded from roles for which she would – when presumed straight – have been considered perfect.
Sure, Rebel Wilson’s money and fame grant her a level of privilege that is unimaginable to most of us. But not even that could shelter her from being outed before she chose to leave the closet on her own terms.
Happy Pride to everyone except Sydney Morning Herald.
