If you’re like me, you’re probably eyeing the news and realizing that this year is going to be yet another stay at home Valentine’s day. But don’t despair (yet). Valentine’s day is the perfect time to cook something sweet together, and who knows where all that sensuous pouring, stirring, and spoon-licking might lead.
Most of the recipes below feature Valentine Day’s most popular ingredient: chocolate. Once believed to be an aphrodisiac, the aromatic wafts of chocolate from the kitchen can transform any couch into a chaise lounge for two. All of these recipes are perfect vegetarian or vegan valentines desserts, because the stereotype that lesbians are vegan has an (un)fortunate habit of being true. Uncork a bottle of wine, light some unscented candles (I find scented ones don’t really mix with culinary adventures), and starting fingering that dough, together.
Check out these five easy but luscious recipes by Sapphic chefs (and non-binary bakers) for some Valentine’s Day sweets.
Vegan Irish Whiskey Chocolate Mousse
This Irish Whiskey Chocolate Mousse from lesbian-owned Bloodroot, is delicious with a dollop of whipped cream in a shared ramekin or where ever else you might be inspired to put it. The mousse is boozy and completely vegan (which is how your girlfriend describes her dietary practices now that you’re in too deep to change your mind). The only special tools you need to make this one are a food processor or blender, and it’s ready in 20 minutes or less. Adapted from The Bloodroot Calendar Cookbook.
Melt 6 oz of good dark chocolate in 3/4 cup plant-based milk over low heat. Purée the flesh of 1 Hass avocado with 3 tablespoons Irish whiskey in a food processor or blender. Add melted chocolate, 2-3 tablespoons of agave or honey, a pinch of salt. Process until smooth, adding extra avocado if it’s too thin. Turn into 4 to 5 small ramekins, serve with (vegan) whipped cream.
Chocolate Slathered Choux Pastry Hearts
The word “Choux,” a delicate pastry used in French baking, usually brings to mind some panic-attack worthy scenes from the Great British Bake Off. But Jack Monroe‘s (author of A Girl Called Jack) easy Chocolate Slathered Choux Pastry Hearts will transport you and your lover to a tiny bistro table on a quiet side street in Paris. Are those twinkly lights strung between the balconies or her eyes?
Monroe’s take on Choux dough allows you to simply mix the majority of the ingredients with a spatula (no fancy equipment required). Dough can be shaped into hearts with a frosting piper or a cookie cutter. While the recipe is easy, between heating up ingredients, baking, and filling this recipe will take a little over an hour. View the full recipe here.
Chocolate Raspberry Fudge Cake
Julia Turshen‘s Happy Wife, Happy Life Chocolate Cake may be more for the post-U-haul crowd (unless you were planning a Valentine’s Day proposal or you like a processing sesh a little too much). This cake features a tangy chocolate sour-cream frosting that you might want to double if you’re feeling tart. The layers of fudge-y cake are ribboned with raspberry jam. Is there anything more quintessentially Valentine’s?! I think not.
While the final cake is decadent and looks fancy (layers!), it’s basically a one-bowl recipe that doesn’t require special equipment. Perfect for ditching cleanup for something more fun. The active measuring/mixing/decorating time on this recipe is an hour or less. The baking and cool time are a bit longer but don’t need supervision. See the full recipe here. Adapted from Small Victories.
Rose and Burnt Honey Florentines
Your eyes lock from opposite ends of the dog park. First your dogs’ leashes tangle on the way to her favorite pup-friendly microbrewery. Before you know it, you’re, well, tangling each other. And then you find out: she doesn’t like chocolate. Well, not that she doesn’t like it, but she just prefers other types of desserts. Will love prevail?
Ruby Tandoh‘s Rose and Burnt Honey Florentines are the most romantic cookies I’ve ever seen. A gold river of honey. A coverlet strewn with rose petals. And don’t worry, they are still garnished with a drizzle of chocolate. Just in case.
These cookies are art on a plate, but they’re still quick and easy to make. The only specialty ingredient you might need to buy are rose petals, but Tandoh notes that the recipe is still great without them. Prep and bake time come in under 45 minutes.
Red Wine Hot Chocolate
Elevate Netflix and Chill. Still make something together when you realize that your attention span is better suited to worshipping your love than whisking. One last treat before bed. A. E. Osworth‘s Red Wine Hot Chocolate makes for the most delicious kisses.
Even though this recipe will take a little longer than microwaving a pack of Swiss Miss, it’s more fun to do together and the rich flavor will definitely make up for it. Prep and cook time will be under 20 minutes.
Hopefully what this Valentine’s day may lack in glamorous locals will be made up for with the romance and intimacy of creating something decadent together.
