Jane goes to find Maura because soon it’ll take a road trip or a plane ride to be able to drop in on each other and flirt face-to-face. Looks like they both got a “gift” from Mama R in animal prints. After Maura finds out Jane’s is leopard print she lists off her lady’s big cat characteristics: intelligent, strong, elusive secretive and beautiful. Though, we have known forever that Maura thinks Jane is gorgeous – right, my friend?
Jane soaks in the compliment and says she’s sorry Maura is a “turtle” back. And, for old time’s sake, Maura corrects her with “tortoise.” Some people flirt by batting their eyes or tossing their hair, Jane Rizzoli flirts by intentionally misidentifying hard-shelled reptiles.
They continue what could possibly be their last dead body flirt, and then Jane asks her if she’d ever run out of “crazy medical terms” to tell her. Read: Would you ever run out of code ways to say you love me? Maura replies, “Would you let the door hit you in the face as you entered?” Read: If the Eskimo have 50 words for snow us gay gals can have at least as many ways to secretly say I love you. As Jane leaves she fake hits herself in the face with the door. Read: I love you right back, baby.
Creepy Stalker Kent continues to try to record people’s goodbye messages. Nina is first. Look, this would all be a lot more emotional if that doofus wasn’t behind the camera and everyone knows it. Meanwhile Korsak begins to pack up his desk because today is suddenly his last day thanks to sick time and vacation hours. Jane hates watching him leave, and eventually offers him $1,000 to stop packing. Hey, I have to move soon. Will someone please offer me money to stop packing, too?
Back at the Robber, Ron is taking a video voyeur page out of Kent’s book and secretly recording Mama R talking about everyone leaving. The party is – surprise, surprise – for Jane and Maura as well. So she starts talking about how she used to make Jane and Frankie come home for Sunday dinners. And then Maura started coming, too. Then Korsak and Kiki came. And now Nina. So, basically, all the couples gathered for dinner together with their significant others. Love, and lasagna, makes a family.
Speaking of family, Nina tricks Jane into Skyping with her mom. She has been teaching Mama R to videoconference and it’s kind of cute. It’s like how my mother always tells me to “do the Google” when she wants me to look something up online for her. But Jane doesn’t like the idea because her Skype sessions are for Maura’s eyes only.
Maura’s eyes are currently busy getting frustrated by her inability to find the lab supplies where they should be. Kent tells her he has already moved some things around for his convenience. Dude, she is only leaving for a month. Get over yourself. When Jane comes in – even without knowing his transgression – she treats him with the contempt and grumpiness he so rightly deserves. Her dislike of Kent is one of the show’s true norths.
The case leads them to a strip club in Chinatown. Creepy Kent gets creepily excited that Jane might be going undercover as a stripper. Maura is like, idiot, this is a gay women pretending to be a straight woman who went undercover as a gay woman. You think pretending to be a stripper scares her? Janey is all, “I’ll get the tassels – did I leave them under the bed again, honey?”
So now it’s Korsak’s turn to try to make us cry on camera. Again, Kent is a ruiner and Korsak stands in for fandom by asking, “Do you get punched a lot?” Hey, I’d pay $1,000 to get to punch Kent – just putting it out there.
Jane, who is most clearly wearing tassels under her blazer, heads to the Second Pleasure Asian strip club with Korsak. If it weren’t for the horrible sexual exploitation, I’d say they were scouting venues for their going away party. The skeazy host spots them and tries to shoo Jane out because “lady friends” are not allowed in the club. Ha, buddy, if you only knew.
