Does dyke march exclude actual lesbians? If she mentions her attraction to the female body then yes. Excluding lesbians from lesbian events for outlining the facts — that lesbians share being attracted to females, not feminine presentation — is both a homophobic assault and a symptom of eroded women’s rights.
Female bodily autonomy is a heated topic right now, with the U.S. Supreme Court’s elimination of Roe v. Wade. Due to the U.S.’s global political and cultural influence, women from everywhere should be concerned.
Lesbians — this affects you. Not only are you at risk of men forcing themselves on you, but Justice Thomas suggests same-sex marriage, private sexual acts (which will target homosexual acts) and contraception should be reconsidered.
Lesbians are hated by the left and right. If our right to marriage and sex isn’t being debated by homophobic, misogynistic law-makers, then we’re shamed for the natural exclusion of males from our attraction pool.
For a laugh, I googled “can lesbians be attracted to men?” the top result? Planned Parenthood “educating” me that “People are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or straight to varying degrees,” after already outlining that bisexuality describes the sexual orientation of someone who is attracted to both men and women.
Why not encourage “lesbians” with “crushes on guys” to identify as bisexual? Why does their emotional attachment to the word “lesbian” overrule the definition of lesbianism, that needs to be protected? Why do we need to make lesbian and gay “flexible” when bisexuality exists, for a few people’s feelings? Why aren’t we calling this what it is: homophobia and bisexual erasure?
Sexual orientation isn’t about what we want to be, what we believe, or what we I identify as — it is who we are. If you’re into men and women, say bisexual. If you’re just into women, say lesbian. If you’re only into men, say straight. If you’re not sure then say you’re questioning, or tell people it’s none of their business. Just don’t be so entitled to think you have the power to change the definition of lesbianism.
If you’re in an unsafe situation and need to pretend to be straight, by all means do it. Straight people aren’t oppressed by homosexuals, and we need to survive violent heteronormativity. This article is about the opposite — appropriation of marginalized sexual orientations to make room for absolutely everyone.
Whether it be “political lesbians” claiming their (oftentimes temporary) abstinance from men justifies the “choice” to become lesbian, regardless of genuine attraction to men, or lesbians being pressured to be more inclusive of trans people by pretending they love dick, or law-makers putting our right to sex and relationships on the agenda after ruling in favor of forced pregnancy – it’s hard out here for a real dyke. Yep, even at dyke march.
Who put the dick in dyke march?
In 2018, a group of lesbians went to the Vancouver Dyke March “in superhero costumes and t-shirts with the word “Lesbian” written overtop a drawing of a uterus shaped like a superhero crest,” according to Feminist Current. They “carried homemade signs that featured lesbians we admire — our lesbian heroes — pioneers who have made significant contributions to lesbian culture or allies in the ongoing struggle for lesbian sexual autonomy.”
One of the lesbians they honored was Max Dashu, “[who] has been smeared as a “TERF” (trans-exclusionary feminist) and a bigot, no-platformed from the Witches Confluence in San Francisco after participating in the San Francisco Dyke March, along with allied lesbians, who carried signs reading “Proud to be Lesbian” and “Lesbian Visibility.”
That’s right — a lesbian can be ostracized, her career threatened, because she is deemed exclusionary for cosigning “proud to be a lesbian” and “lesbian visibility.”
You guessed it. The group were approached and ejected from the dyke march. “While we were gathering near McSpadden Park, where the march was to begin, we were approached by two members of the Vancouver Dyke March board. They told us that our T-shirts and placards excluded transwomen and since this was an “inclusive march” we would have to remove them if we wanted to participate.
“We were additionally told that if any of our signs, banners, or t-shirts included the venus symbol — representing “woman” — (the two interlocked venus symbols have always meant lesbian) or “XX,” symbolizing the female sex chromosome, we would also have to remove them. We were warned to not touch anyone and keep our hands to ourselves. Nothing was offered in terms of how our inclusivity and safety would be protected.”
So using the venus symbol at a dyke march is exclusionary? It’s hate speech for a woman to advocate for the definition and experience of authentic lesbianism? A woman referencing her XX chromosomes is exclusionary? We are the most marginalized sexual orientation!
It’s always the lesbians who must walk out.
It’s definitely a mask-off moment for the performativity of social justice action today: lesbians being forced to say they like dick for trans inclusivity is “activism,” but lesbians asserting that the very definition of female homosexuality is the exclusion of male bodies is “hate speech.”
Combining the homophobic “lesbians like dick! Trans inclusivity!” with the homophobic “any woman can be a lesbian if she wants to be — yep, even if she is attracted to men!” means lesbians don’t have anyone in the social justice sphere, besides each other. Females appropriate us, males penetrate us.
Lesbians disagree with each other. That is bound to happen. A lesbian saying “lesbians aren’t attracted to male bodies” isn’t transphobic, it’s a fact. Nobody is abusing trans people by stating the truth. Sex isn’t a human right. And if someone is searching for gender validation in a lesbian’s vagina then that is a red flag, not a campaign to champion.
If you’re a lesbian who would prefer to pretend that lesbians are capable of finding any XY attractive to be polite, accommodating, and to keep yourself safe, then that’s fine. I get it. I’ll march with you. But I draw the line at banning lesbians who won’t lie like that by framing the decision as a matter of “inclusivity,” when you’re excluding the very people the Dyke March is for.
Inclusion is great – in the workplace, playground and government, for example – but when actual lesbians are being ejected from dyke marches in order to include non-lesbians, then it’s an issue. And let’s recap: these lesbians didn’t write “trans people should die” or “fuck trans rights” – their signs were geared towards celebrating their lesbian heroes. They were ejected for holding signs that said “proud to be a lesbian,” featured the double-venus symbol, or referenced XX.
If someone is triggered by mention of the female body’s role in lesbianism then they shouldn’t be at dyke march.
That was 2018, but the exclusion of lesbians from dyke march has only gotten worse. In 2022, a dyke march in Mexico explicitly said that only “lesbixns that love dicks” are allowed. No lesbian loves dick. So no lesbian is allowed. Who put the dick in dyke march?
In all honesty, I don’t care if trans people go to dyke marches. I know that bisexual and non-lesbian “queer” people consider themselves dykes too, and partake in them, despite dyke being a lesbian-specific term. Non-lesbians will always be at dyke marches. Lesbian spaces are always diluted by lesbophobia masked as inclusion. So trans people being there isn’t exactly out of place… or my main concern.
My main concern is that if you do go to dyke marches and have violent mental breakdowns at the sight of lesbians carrying signs that articulate their love for vagina and distaste for dick, then it is you who shouldn’t attend, not the lesbians carrying them. The least you can do is not project your own insecurities on the lesbians that are there. The least you can do is respect lesbians enough to not actively exclude them from lesbian-only spaces over things they can’t control, like not registering you as a sexual or romantic interest.
The lesbian inability to find male bodies attractive is not a choice to exclude because sexual orientation isn’t about preference, or choice, like choosing a partner based on their eye color, political beliefs or hobbies. Lesbians are hated for many reasons and one of them is that our sexual orientation, like heterosexuals and gay men, doesn’t factor-in gender identity.
The more that bisexual women feel entitled to call themselves “lesbian,” the more we hear “but I’m a lesbian, and I sleep with trans women!” In that case, you’re either not a lesbian or you’ve been pressured to validate trans people with your body. If the latter is true, then I’m very sorry. That’s why these discussions are absolutely integral to lesbian class-consciousness.
Like with any event or space for a marginalized group, members of the marginalized group should be first priority. Yes, even if they say something you deem unpalatable. But if lesbians saying “lesbians are not attracted to gender, they’re attracted to sex,” bothers you, if you find it to be “hate speech,” then you’re probably not a lesbian and should keep your mouth shut.
It is not a coincidence that lesbian-only spaces are invaded by non-lesbians. It is no coincidence that the lesbians finding community in such spaces are guilted into surrendering their sexual boundaries to include the very sex that they’re not only innately unattracted to, but the sex that oppresses them.
Society cannot fathom that a female can simply not be into males, regardless of their gender identity. If you have an issue with the way lesbianism operates then you are a lesbophobe and you should stay away from them, not penetrate their boundaries further.
Putting the dick in dyke march is violence against lesbians.
